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Wavey's Jokes Corner (May contain nuts)
Male or female?
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<blockquote data-quote="Topper" data-source="post: 945555" data-attributes="member: 186250"><p>Male or Female?</p><p></p><p></p><p>You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples:</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><u>FREEZER BAGS</u>:</p><p>They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>PHOTOCOPIERS</u>:</p><p>These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons.</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>TYRES</u>:</p><p>Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>HOT AIR BALLOONS</u>:</p><p>Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt.</p><p></p><p><u>SPONGES</u>:</p><p>These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.</p><p></p><p><u>WEB PAGES</u>:</p><p>Female, because they're constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>TRAINS</u>:</p><p>Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>EGG TIMERS</u>:</p><p></p><p>Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p><u>HAMMERS</u>:</p><p>Male, because in the last 5000 years, they've hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>THE REMOTE CONTROL</u>:</p><p>Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>New Law:</p><p></p><p>With the high rate of attacks on women in secluded parking lots, especially during evening hours, the Minneapolis City Council has established a 'Women Only' parking lot at the Mall of America. Even the parking lot attendants are exclusively female so that a comfortable and safe environment is created for patrons..</p><p>Below is the first picture available of this world-first women-only parking lot in Minnesota ..</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Topper, post: 945555, member: 186250"] Male or Female? You might not have known this, but a lot of non-living objects are actually either male or female. Here are some examples: [U]FREEZER BAGS[/U]: They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. [U]PHOTOCOPIERS[/U]: These are female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong Buttons. [U]TYRES[/U]: Tires are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated [U]HOT AIR BALLOONS[/U]: Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their butt. [U]SPONGES[/U]: These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water. [U]WEB PAGES[/U]: Female, because they're constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on. [U]TRAINS[/U]: Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people. [U]EGG TIMERS[/U]: Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom. [U]HAMMERS[/U]: Male, because in the last 5000 years, they've hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around. [U]THE REMOTE CONTROL[/U]: Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying. New Law: With the high rate of attacks on women in secluded parking lots, especially during evening hours, the Minneapolis City Council has established a 'Women Only' parking lot at the Mall of America. Even the parking lot attendants are exclusively female so that a comfortable and safe environment is created for patrons.. Below is the first picture available of this world-first women-only parking lot in Minnesota .. [/QUOTE]
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