Potatoes

[Topper]

Well, a girl potato and boy potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam'.
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.
When it was time, they told her about the facts of life. They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'hot potato'.
Yam said not to worry, no spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!
But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a couch potato either.
So when she went off travelling around Europe in her gap year, Mr. And Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for those hard-boiled guys from Ireland and the greasy guys from France called the French Fries, and when she went out to the USA, she must watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.
They sent Yam to the USA to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University ). So that when she graduated she'd really be "in the chips".
But in spite of all they did for her, one-day following her graduation Yam came home and announced she was going to marry John Motson.

"John Motson!!!!", they cried.
They were very upset and told Yam "You can't possibly marry John Motson because he's just ........

Are you ready for this? Are you sure?
*
OK! You asked for it: Here it is!
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
... just a COMMONTATER!"